Has anything happened in your adult life, that made you instantly regress back to childhood? That frightened and unsure state of mind that eventually lead to you being misunderstood.
Where people think you’re the one overreacting, because they’re too intoxicated. But hold on I’m the child here, why with these people are we affiliated?
Why do you let these fiends look at me like I’m fair game? Make me feel dirty and bring on the shame?
These monsters demand I let them hug me, kiss me on the cheek, and I slowly see their hands begin creep.
I run up to bed and wish you all goodnight. I’m too little to fight you all, you must see it’s not right?
It goes on many years still, but now I am a teenager hiding in my room. I’ve hit puberty now, and I do not want to face them.
But because I’m drinking and smoking upstairs, they seem to think it’s ok to come in? They knock once, open the door, eyes wide open with a predators grin.
Yellow teeth from tobacco and stained with red wine. “Hey Hayley, you fancy a line?”
“NO thank you! I know your game. Get me high, so I want the same. Look, old men I do not give you permission. Fuck you and your coked up pervy mission!”
But I smile and say “Thanks but no thanks.” I explain that I’m not feeling so good. Hoping they’d get the hint and leave my room, like they should!
Then they sit on my bed asking me what’s up? Erm… it might be the fact your creeping me out, “FUCK OFF!” And there I go starting a scene. Because of corse it’s not the men being obscene.
It’s my fault for wearing that. My curves are on show, I know what I’m doing. Obviously by hiding away I’m setting a challenge and when they come up I’ll be all inviting?
What the fuck goes through these bastard heads and why won’t you help me? So now I rush down the stairs feeling sick and violently angry.
I scream and shout and push and shove. Every one shocked! “She’s pretty tough?!” My adrenaline brewing I’m fighting big men. So angry now and I’m beating them.
“GET OUT!” I hear, but that’s not me. My guardians are mad you see. I ruined their night, so I should go. I the teenager, should be kicked out the home!
So when I’m here as old as they were. Sometime predators begin to stir. Bring on the misogyny, bring on the shame. Let’s mention your naked body, your 30 and fair game!